Hubby and I purchased our raspberry plants several years ago. It was the middle of the winter, and Home Depot had little cardboard tubes of raspberries, blueberries, and strawberries for sale just outside the front entrance.
Hubby and I were weary of winter and anxious for spring to arrive, so we picked up four little cardboard tubes of raspberries. I was excited to grow raspberries! I love raspberries!
Inside each little cardboard tube was a small pitiful piece of bare root.
I dug four little holes in the garden … and planted the four pitiful pieces of bare root.
It never occurred to me that the resulting raspberries would not be exactly like the large, rosy-mauve raspberries available for purchase at the grocery store.
Last year was the first year our raspberry canes actually produced berries. And much to my shock … our raspberries were nothing at all like the large, rosy-mauve raspberries available for purchase at the grocery store.
Our raspberries were small. They were a completely different color of red. And they were distinctly sticky.
These raspberries were nothing at all like what hubby and I were expecting!
When it comes to life, we each have certain preconceived expectations about different things.
Our expectations about people are one of these things. And then it turns out that people aren’t exactly what we were expecting.
The raspberries in our garden were nothing like what I was expecting. But that didn’t mean anything was wrong with them. They still had a wonderful flavor!
In fact, as I have been picking raspberries this summer it just occurred to me that our raspberries are strikingly similar to the Blackcap raspberries which are growing wild in our forest.
I had never heard of Blackcap raspberries before … not until our Forestry Class professor came to our property for a site visit two summers ago. As he walked our property with us, he was particularly taken with a certain “blackberry vine.” At the time I didn’t know much about the different plants growing in our forest, so I assumed every prickly vine was a “blackberry vine.”
But no. Our Forestry professor informed us this particular vine was a Blackcap raspberry vine. He pointed out how to identify it.
Sure enough! It was a completely different vine than the typical blackberry vines.
Our Forestry professor told us Blackcap raspberries were his absolute favorite! From that moment on, I very much wanted to try a Blackcap raspberry to see what it tasted like!
But the thing is … the deer who call our forest home also like Blackcap raspberries very much! Meaning – they very much like eating the small tender leaves from the Blackcap raspberry vines.
Over the last year, every Blackcap raspberry vine I have come across in the forest has been eaten back to practically nothing.
Until this year!
This year for some reason the Blackcap raspberry vines are thriving … here … and there … and all over the place in the forest! And … I have even come across a few actual berries! Whoo Hoo!!
Check it out! Wild Blackcap raspberries alongside the raspberries from our garden.
They are almost identical! They are the same size. And they are the same shape.
Our Forestry professor was right … Blackcap raspberries do indeed have a fabulous flavor! It’s completely unique and distinct. Yet it tastes like a raspberry.
So, I guess you could say that the raspberries growing in our garden, while not exactly what hubby and I were originally expecting, are actually more normal and more real (like the wild raspberries growing in nature) … than the rosy-mauve raspberries at the grocery store.
It is the same when it comes to people. We have certain expectations of people. Then much to our surprise … they are nothing at all like what we are expecting.
We are disappointed. We aren’t quite sure how to respond.
We draw conclusions. We pass judgment.
But just because someone isn’t exactly what we are expecting does not mean it’s a bad thing. Any more than the raspberries in our garden.
The person who is different from what we are expecting might just be like the raspberries in our garden which are more “normal” and “authentically real” than I ever realized.
It’s good not to be too hasty when it comes to making assumptions and passing judgments about people.
It might be that we ourselves don’t know the whole picture about who they truly are.
